..The Colors of Friendship..

There are many types of friends. In the three decades of my life, I'd seen multiple facets of that thing called friendship - I even fall into some categories! However, since I am bored with the document that I am writing, here's my breather on that colorful jewel called Friendship:

The Sunny Orange
These are friends so bubbly, that you would rather not have their company in your darkest hours. They are the ones who come on a little insensitive, or naive perhaps and would be the ones who narrate about the beautiful flowers that they see on the way to work. They will be the ones who tell you that '..your boss is a good guy - you got to learn to accept him, give him a chance he will change!..' regardless of your rants. Obviously these are the type of friends who would not be wet blankets at gatherings or parties - they may even be the ones who initiate that bungee-jump because 'you only have one life, live it!'. So if you are looking for new things to do, challenge yourself or you need a little sunshine, look for the sunny oranges.

The Sweet Pink
These are really soft-spoken people and may come in petite sizes sometimes (sorry for the stereotyping). You actually feel like a cow just sitting next to them. They are so demure that you get all robotic trying to fit in (because being demure - not your forte!). You even control your normal usage of words with As and Fs in them, because you are afraid you may scare them off. These are the friends that you would be reluctant to have at mealtimes because they would eat that ramen strand by strand, lifting the cutleries really slowly, and you had to do the same even though instinctively, you just want to gulp it down. They could be quite picky too, such that you could actually feel deprieved. I suppose if you were going to have an audience with the Queen (or maybe your future in-laws), get help from the sweet pinks. You could be transformed into a fairylike person - even if it was just for one night!

The Nostalgic Blues
If you want to reminiscise about the past or what you did in school, look for them. They may even come to you in the school uniform because 'hey, it's Standard 5 Blue's reunion, do you remember the time...' They may still treat you as if you were in Standard 5 Blue, calling you names that you had wished everyone had forgotten while giving you a thump on the back (that hurts now because of your bad back!) - just like old times. During your conversations, they will keep reminding you about Mrs So and So and how she ate the chalk, Mr Tis-for-tat who had a crush on you, or that weirdo in school who kept following you around. Knucklehead remarks aside, these are the friends who could bring you back to simpler times - when you were carefree and didn't have to worry about loans.

The Gray Area
So! They ask you about what's going-on in your life, down to the tiniest details. They even ask you about what's going on with other people's life (because probably they know you are the biggest gossip in town!). And then you pop the ultimate question: So what's up with you? You either get no reply, or just a quick OK before the next interrogation session about what happened at the gathering you had last weekend. You do not know what to make of such friend, if you should get close to them or just ignore them. Most of the time it's the former, because the interrogation sessions, they are real ice-breakers! These friends appear ungrateful at times, because if they find that they do not need to milk information out of you, they just get on with their lives and leave you out of it. Until the day they need an update or help, all you will get from this friend is nothing. Love them or hate them; really, you just can't live without them because admit it, the bitching thoughts after, are really theraupetic.

The Flashy Fluorescent Green
Think Sacha Baron Cohen in those ugly glowing green suspenders.
No, these are not pervertic people we're talking about but rather, people who just love being the center of attention. Wherever possible, they would (subconsciously) steal the limelight. These are friends who really think that they deserve your full attention and do not really bother about your well-being at all. So they will just drop you the congenial 'how are you doing', before starting to rattle about how their hair frizzled after a perm or that the postman was rude this morning. They are also the ones who think that the world is being unfair to only them and say that that issue with your husband is minute as compared to their hair problem. Depressing news aside, they are also ones who would tell you how their trip to Tibidabo 'is MUCH MUCH better' than your trip to Israel. Sure they are nice people to chat with, but only if you are having one of those days where you just want to milk information for your gossip sessions (with others of course) without having to give away any!

So what am I?
To be fair, I could be a little bit of everything maybe even more, depending on the weather :D!
But of course, the final decision is in the hands of my colorful friends!
Time to go back to my document!

..My Favourite Convo..Oh..Oh..Oh..Oh..

Snippet from an actual conversation that I had on IM recently.
Disclaimer: We are not responsible for any copyright infringement, we were just fooling around the Block!

Buddy: how's it hangin?
Kay Lee: tough
Buddy: cool....
Buddy: but you're not a new kid anymore rite?
Kay Lee: no
Buddy: then you should have the right stuff now...
Buddy: so shouldn't be hangin tough anymore
Kay Lee: m taking it step by step
Kay Lee: baby i believe in you
Buddy: s**t...
Buddy: ran out of NKOTB songs
Kay Lee: you got it..the right stuff
Kay Lee: o ya u said that
Buddy: yeah i did...
Buddy: the only one i can think of now is ...
Buddy: please dun go girl.....
Kay Lee: what if I go away..
Buddy: then it would be like in the summer time
Kay Lee: i've got a funny feeling about this
Buddy: is that an NKOTB song?
Kay Lee: i tink we shud try it again...

Step over Whose Line.

..Point of Deception..

It's despicable. People who do not work at all get all the advantages, the benefits, the reputation. Those who toil like asses tilling land, still had to get their limbs dirty from the muddy fields. So where is the fairness in all these?

A certain person in my list of 'I'd Die If I Don't Despise You' people is reaping all the rewards from the fields that we sowed. He just sits there, apparently macro-managing us - 'I do not want to appear intrusive to what you are doing, I believe in letting my people manage their own' but the fact is, he really just sits there.

We toiled through our critical deadlines and urgent deliveries and not once did he asked about how we are doing. The only time he asked? Was when he needs to report the findings. When he needed to save his own arse. He normally parasites facts implicitly and fishes knowledge and details ('so what do you reckon about this?') from us, so that he could put it in long sentences to win him favour from his own upper management. He has never taken the effort to learn about the company's product. What little knowledge he has, he'd twist and turn it to his benefit. I bet if he took an exam about it now, he'd probably fail miserably. Since he took over, about 2 members have left 'demotivated', with one more in the pipeline.

I do not know if others see it, but I hate being used. The worst thing is that he is so nice and sweet that you would not realise that you are being used. There was never a time when we were in trouble, that he came to our rescue. He will just use the excuse 'I prefer people who come to me with solutions, rather than wait for me to provide them with one'. Well, if you are literally illiterate in what your people are doing, that will be the easiest way out wouldn't it?

And now an email has just arrived saying that he'd be given extra responsibilities to replace a certain someone 'under his leadership'. Leadership my a**. A true leader do not abandon his team members in times of need and beckon to them only after the storm. A true leader works with the team, and not sacrifice the team for his own benefits. A true leader do not need to beg for respect, he will earn it.

This may sound juvenile to some, but I am just speaking the truth. The only thing that's helping me to survive now? That the truth shall prevail.

I hope the deception does not outlast me. I am being very very patient already.

..P.S. I Love You..

It wrenched my heart when Gerry hobbled over to Swords Travel Agency, slowly making his way to the counter where Barbara was furiously (pretending) to type on her keypad. From afar she had thought that he was a hunched old man with a walking stick. She had a good look at the pasty-skinned man in front of her and could not help but smile at his puppy-eyes that have seen better days. Barbara assisted him in booking a surprise holiday to Lanzarote, Spain for his wife and her friends. She was on the brink of tears when he left, much to the curiousity of her Boss.

I shared Holly's melancholy when she returned to an empty house after a night out with her friends and family. I understood her need to just curl up in bed, just so that time could fly by without her having to do anything about it. I was also drawn to her supportive friends and family (who could be irritating at times, but still) and am glad that she got all the encouragement and understanding in her times of need. I sympathized with the guilt that she felt in having loved someone else other than Gerry.

So strong were the emotions described by Cecelia Ahern that I had to stop myself from tearing up while reading. The characters were brought to life effortlessly, mimicking as close as possible reality and the reminding us of the fact that life is not always a bed of roses - no sugar coating whatsoever. She did not discount on the occassional pain in the ass family member and friend or that embarassing moment that needs to be forgotten but was not. She successfully portrayed Holly's grief with such empathy and sensitivity that you cannot help but pour all your compassion to her.

I had always assumed that P.S. I Love You was another one of those romantic sob stories of breakups and quarrels (shallow!) and have always overlooked it in the bookstores. But having read it, it tugged at my heartstrings in ways no other books could have done. It is a story of appreciation of life and learning to let go, that there IS life after death.

Many a times, I have complained about my life with misgivings about the people around me.P.S. I Love You taught me to overlook the bad and appreciate the good, to look for the rainbow when it is stormy. It taught me the perspective of 'what if I was left all alone to face the world, would I be as strong as Holly?' It made me more appreciative of life and all the people in it.

I do not regret my Rs195 purchase of P.S. I Love You because the emotions shared and the lessons learnt were priceless. I will never get over this book.

..8 July 2009..

Liam celebrated his 26th birthday yesterday.
OK I wouldn't call having a bad bout of flu and runny nose a celebration, but well, it was a special day. His day was spent on sleeping and popping antibiotics, and I'm glad to say that he is much better today.

The wonders of what that thing called the telephone could do.
I couldn't make it back to celebrate his birthday and managed only wish him over the phone.
It's never too late for a celebration anyway!

Backtracking to the same day a year ago, we celebrated Mak's 100th day as well. Time really flies. At least if you do not think about it. It was more sombre back then than it is now.

I suppose what they say is true. Time heals, and it is slowly doing that for us.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY BRO :)

..Exactly 1 Year 2 Months and 3 Days..

Quite some time had passed since I'd last updated this blog.
Well, thanks to the wonders of FB that allows you to blog, post pictures, write on walls and do whatever you want on it, sexysiren got sort of 'abandoned'.

My last post was about how 9 months had passed since Mak's death.
Today, it is exactly 1 year, 2 months and 3 days after.
How time flies.

However, fret not. Sexysiren shall be revived with 'sunnier' posts.
It is how life had gone on.
1 year, 2 months and 3 days after.

..8th and 9th Month..

If it was about a pregnancy, I guess I'd be blogging about it being the final trimester, preparing for the birth yada-yada. But no.

Mak's absence for the 8th month, followed by the 9th were no different than that of the previous months. We still miss her tremendously and we still talk about her fondly as if she was still around, secretly yearning for her presence. No, it's not that we're not moving on. The difference is that we could talk about Mak more openly now, without being driven to tears (at least not out in the open!).

Will got the hang of keeping house - surprise, surprise! I joked with him that soon he'd have a knack for nagging unsightly mess away, just like Mak, bless her soul. I suppose for the three of us who are away from home, being away quite helped us in coping with the loss. Yours truly was kept busy the past couple of months with house shifting and stuff, Sis was busy looking for one (and also with Christmas). Jeff got posted to O&G this semester, so his hands are basically full.

Occassionally the four of us would 'meet up' online, thanks to the wonders of instant messaging. We'd talk about the dreams that we had of Mak; we still do dream about her, and will discuss about it to interpret the 'message'. In a way, dreams about Mak was actually a comforting way to know that she is still in our hearts (or that she's still around, watching over us).

We 'invited' Mak home on Christmas Day to our family's ancestral tablet, so that she could be in the place that she spent most of her fifty-nine years in. We could somehow instinctively that Mak appreciated that. It felt good to have her 'back home' at last.

Chinese New Year is just around the corner, and usually at this time, Mak will be kept busy until way past the actual day. This year, it will just be the four of us and Papa, so I suppose a quiet celebration is in the books.

It has been more than 9 months Mak, it is good to know that you are alright.

Mak, you are there in whatever we do. You are the greatest Mak. We love you.

..25th November..Keys to a new beginning..

Finally!
After close to three months of waiting, it's finally here! We're excited and look forward to a new beginning, in a new place!